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I'm an ass

The other day's Facebook status - "Sunny doesn't base what she does right on what someone else does wrong. Consider me an independent variable."

I was proud of that. It relates to everything in my life. How does it relate to training? I base my performance on what I feel I can do, my own expectations. I don't/shouldn't base it on someone else's performance. Case in point:

Person 1 - "What did you run that 5k in?"
Person 2 - "24. You?"
Person 1 - "Wow, that's great. I ran it in 27. My time sucks."

Well Person 1, if you live your life dependent on someone else's performance, I guess you do suck. If you consider your performance along your own standards, maybe you did ok. Maybe you were running with a sprained ankle, no sleep, and hungry. 27 is great.

Case 2.

Person 1 - "I need a rabbit to pace me for my fitness test. I'm not good pacing myself and I find it motivating when I have to chase someone."

What if the pacer gets sick? What if you are so far in front of the pack you have no one to chase? Could you have done better if you learned to create your own motivation? And knowing that you are horrible at pacing yourself, why didn't you work on that? Dependent!

In case you're wondering, it's get rid of excuses time for me. I realized there is a place I want to be, in my head. Excuses do not get me to this place. I am looking at things said in the past and how those little excuses have caused lack luster performances. There's a lot I wanted to do, but didn't do and it makes me sad to know there's no one to blame but me. Then I think of the worst - someone sees me being lazy and uses that as an excuse to do the same. I like being a leader and I hate thinking that I may have set that example for someone to follow. CRAP!!

Right now, I'm concentrating on being an independent variable. Step 1 - fuck everyone else (you know what I mean), set my own standards. It may sound selfish, but I will not risk a difference of opinion affecting the standards I set for myself.
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